The Friend’s reports from Yearly Meeting preparation sessions and special interest meetings continues

Yearly Meeting 2024: Preparation - part fifteen

The Friend’s reports from Yearly Meeting preparation sessions and special interest meetings continues

by Lis Burch, Rebecca Hardy, Imi Hills, Joseph Jones, Alastair Reid, and Elinor Smallman 19th July 2024

A preparation session on Truth and integrity in public life was held by Yearly Meeting Agenda Committee (YMAC).

The seventy-six Friends who gathered first watched a video featuring four Friends with public-facing work (spanning teaching, mental health, government, and civic roles). They offered their experiences of truth and integrity. One commented that in the mental health field ‘truth is difficult but integrity in how we work is vital’, while another noted the importance of ‘consistency in my treatment of others with dignity and an open mind’.

Gerald Hewitson, co-clerk of the Quaker Truth and Integrity Group (QTIG), then spoke about the issues the group was wrestling with. He described this as being framed by two Swarthmore Lectures: one in 1974 by Wolf Mendl, called ‘Prophets and reconcilers’, and the 2021 lecture by Thomas Penny, where he spoke of ‘kinder ground’.

QTIG writes letters of appreciation ‘when we see examples of people standing up for truth’, and has an annual award for individuals or organisations who ‘present an outstanding contribution towards the enhancement of standards of truth and integrity in public life’.

Grace da Costa, public affairs and media manager at Quakers in Britain, described how her role enables her to ‘build relationships with politicians and other civil society groups so that we can try to bring about changes in the policy and law and behaviour of the UK’.

She described the development of a national truth and integrity project, including the hiring of a new public affairs officer, Billy Vaughan. She also outlined how the discernment of Meeting for Sufferings affected her work, especially the request that staff ‘consider using the Quaker method of quiet diplomacy to address the challenge of truth and integrity in public life’.

The project’s first quiet diplomacy event was held in 2023 and more have been held since.

In the rich and thought-provoking hour that followed, speakers were asked a series of questions, exploring: the difference between the work done by BYM and Quaker Recognised Bodies; what the main aim of this work is; how aims have evolved; examples of what’s been achieved; whether this work is uniquely Quaker; what truth is in a political context; what the difference is between truth and integrity; and what things lead Friends to despair, or give them hope.

Gerald reflected: ‘No matter how bleak, God’s love finds creative ways to break through; light comes through in the darkest of circumstances.’

On Tuesday morning a special interest group on Peacebuilding within our own communities: challenge and opportunity saw twenty-five Friends gather with members of Restoring Relations.

Restoring Relations provides information, training, and facilitators for Meetings that are experiencing conflict.

Alistair Heslop introduced the session, and described conflict within Meetings as challenging and difficult, but also said ‘there is an opportunity there as well… to build connections and deeper roots’.

Alistair also spoke about Quaker listening spaces, which is a practise introduced in 2022 that Meetings can use to bring people together.

Effective listening is ‘central to what we do’, but often in conversations people are thinking about what they’re going to say next rather than focussing on the other person. An acronym Restoring Relations uses is HUE: Hearing, Understanding, and Exploring. This gives people ‘a full opportunity to be heard’.

To experience this, Friends were paired up in breakout rooms to consider quotes about peace, with these practices in mind. When Friends came back together they were encouraged to consider: ‘What was it like to be listened to in that way? What was it like to be the listener for that person?’ and ‘What do you think helps your community to be peaceful, and what do you think hinders peace in your community?’

Trust, openness, safety, and a ‘freedom to be curious’ without the pressure of having your own opinion were shared.

Friends also expressed that guilt, intimidation, and conflict avoidance can hinder this process.

Towards the end of the Meeting a Friend offered that ‘when I was listening, it was a huge privilege to be trusted’ and that having things shared openly with them ‘opened something in me’. 

Writing by: Lis Burch, a trustee of the Friend; Rebecca Hardy, journalist at the Friend; Imi Hills, a freelancer from West Weald Meeting; Joseph Jones, editor of the Friend; Alastair Reid, a trustee of the Friend; and Elinor Smallman, production manager at the Friend.


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