Meeting for Sufferings: Friends hear from Quaker chaplains
'Sometimes, I just sit by a patient so they can have a peaceful death… we can all provide pastoral care. We can all provide space to listen.’
The day ended with Friends hearing from three Quaker chaplains. Robin Fishwick, a Quaker chaplain at the University of Leeds, said he is often asked how many Friends are at the university (‘a few’), but ‘this is not particularly relevant’. Aside from a few ‘Quaker-specific things’ – for example, a weekly Meeting for Worship – most of his work is serving the whole community as a Quaker. ‘Being a Quaker does mean it’s a lot easier to work alongside people of other faiths’, he said, or those not particularly religious. ‘I think that’s sometimes underestimated by universities.’
The ‘Quakerly things’ that contribute to his role, he says, include helping people through grief or bereavement, and managing conflict. With an out-of-hours phone number, students or staff can ring in any kind of crisis during night-time, or meet with a chaplain and talk. Sometimes people come because they’re easier to access than the student support service or counselling. ‘What I would like Area Meetings to do,’ he said, ‘is see whether there is anyone interested in working as a Quaker University chaplain… and to make sure that students and staff at the universities are aware of what chaplaincies are doing, and to build relationships.’
Sarah Bower, a part-time hospital chaplain at St Thomas in London’s Westminster, then spoke about her work volunteering in a team of fifteen chaplains with a wide range of faiths, including Islam, Buddhism, Church of England and Roman Catholic, as well as humanists. ‘Most people expect me to ask about their faith when I come on the ward,’ she said, ‘but it’s the last thing I want to do… Our main role is to show that we care, and to be able to give time. We are often one of the few staff that does have time, and to listen reflectively on what they can share. It is always patient-led.’
‘I love listening to their stories,’ she added, which range from ‘harrowing to inspiring’. Many people have been isolated for a long time, and she will talk to everyone who has not had visitors. ‘Many people at Westminster have no fixed abode and come in off the streets; some are homeless, have mental health difficulties, or often no families.’ Often she is listening on two levels: the cerebral and ‘the unspoken’ or spiritual, ‘attempting to let that of God in me reach out to that of God in the patient… I ask that I be used as a channel so I can listen without an agenda. If they only feel that they have been cared for, then I regard it as a success. Sometimes, I just sit by a patient so they can have a peaceful death… we can all provide pastoral care. We can all provide space to listen.’
Emma Roberts described her work at a maximum security prison. After shadowing an Anglican chaplain, she developed a contemplation group, which still runs. ‘The men who come want some quiet time, time to reflect and share,’ she said. At her prison there are people with life sentences, which ‘generates a very different type of Quaker group’. Many of the attenders identify as Quaker and are members. ‘What I wanted to remind you is, there are Quaker communities which you have never heard about. This is quite meaningful to me.’
Emma also wants to raise awareness of how powerful chaplaincy is, with many stories of how it has turned lives around. ‘Of the 120 prisons and locked establishments across the country, only half of them have Quaker chaplains, so there are lots of vacancies.’
The skills required in chaplaincy are ‘complex’, she said: including resilience, in clearing the hurdles to become one. You are also expected to be a theologian, a historian, a group facilitator, a spiritual guide, and pastoral carer. Strong personal boundaries are also essential: ‘you might get groomed and encouraged to do things you really shouldn’t.’
How can Friends support chaplains? Think about their costs, she said: ask chaplains about their work and the Quaker communities inside, because ‘it is quite an isolated role’.
Friends thanked the chaplains for their work, and heard of the pathway to chaplaincy accreditation at Woodbrooke.
Minutes are available at www.quaker.org.uk/mfspapers.
