Wendy and her friend Photo: courtesy David Channer
Double standard: Howard Grace on two joyful men
‘Gyatso and Tutu are examples of how life experience is more fundamental than differences in belief.’
When our daughter Wendy was about seven years old, she joined us at a reception for Tenzin Gyatso, the fourteenth dalai lama. Wendy and her friend (pictured) were playing hide and seek, and their heads popped up from behind a sofa he was about to sit on. He loved that, welcomed them out from behind it, and gave them a big hug.
In that brief encounter, I sensed a deeply spiritual person. That is striking for one who has been forced to tread a very delicate tightrope since fleeing his beloved homeland of Tibet in 1959 because of the political aspirations of the Chinese government. Gyatso has lived in exile since then, and is well known as the dedicated leader of his Buddhist people. In 1989, he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.
Desmond Tutu was brought up in poverty in a South African township during the apartheid era. He became his country’s Anglican archbishop, well known for his opposition to the regime. He too received the Nobel Peace Prize. In 1995, he became the head of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, which investigated allegations of human rights abuses during the apartheid era.
These two leaders, with very different backgrounds and religious beliefs, met together several times before Tutu’s death last year. They had very similar mischievous and joyful spirits. The last time they met was to write a book on the subject of joy(1). This profound work became an international bestseller. A film of their time together preparing the book is currently available on the BBC iPlayer.
Much could be written about the encounters between these two men. One was grounded in his Christian faith, and the other emerges from the Gelug (or ‘Yellow Hat’)nontheist Buddhist tradition. Their doctrinal beliefs differ radically, but their spiritual experiences have much in common. Just one of the things that particularly struck me is the unanimity of their observation that joy comes from within, when one is centred more on the wellbeing of others.
Gyatso and Tutu are wonderful examples of how our life experience is more fundamental than the differences in our beliefs. In one passage of the book Tutu writes, ‘Do you really think that when the Dalai Lama arrives in heaven, that God will say, “Oh, Dalai Lama, you’ve been so wonderful. What a pity you are not a Christian. You’ll have to go to the warmer place.” Everybody sees just how entirely ridiculous this is.’
Exploring the relationship between these two is a worthwhile venture for any Friends aiming to foster our shared humanity.
Footnote: 1. The Book of Joy: Lasting happiness in a changing world
