What it means to be a Quaker today: Kindness and love
Ian Kirk-Smith was engaged by a powerful personal address and session on ‘What it means to be a Quaker today’
‘Quakerism has changed during the last thirty years and it continues to change. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t be Quakerism.’ Geoffrey Durham, in opening the Sunday afternoon session, was a Friend charged with conviction, passion and energy. His address was an articulate and achieved piece of personal ministry and, in taking stock of ‘what we have and who we are’, he highlighted a number of key words: worship, stillness, change, listening, discipline, action and love.
‘People’, he said, ‘like to get straight to the point. Tell me what Quakerism is. What do you believe? Just put it in a nutshell’.
He continued: ‘I sometimes start by telling these questioners, as gently as I can, that if you can put your religious faith into a nutshell, that is probably where it belongs’.
The smiles on faces around the room were accompanied by nods of approval. Geoffrey then examined some of the fragments that make up the Quaker mosaic and began with the foundation: the ‘right holding of meeting for worship’. Without it the title of the session – What it means to be a Quaker today – was ‘thin and insubstantial’.
People speak of Quaker silence. He offered a correction. It should not be silence: ‘The right holding of meeting for worship encourages stillness out of the silence and it is Quaker stillness that can engender radical change’.
Change
He reminded Friends that ‘the whole of life is sacramental’ and that ‘we do not fear uncertainty’ and, while the valiant Quakers of the 1650s would not recognise the Religious Society of Friends today, he hoped ‘they would understand how we got here, because we know that they, too, were open to new light. We welcome change. Indeed, we demand it.’
Could the relentless train of change travel any way it wished? No, he said, Quakers cannot believe what they liked. Geoffrey examined the idea of ‘discipline’ and coupled it, in importance, with the word ‘love’. These were essentials in the Quaker way and the tracks it travelled on.
Ultimately, what it means to be a Quaker today is intimately bound up with the idea of ‘sacramental living’ – living a life that is spirit led – and he referred to the extraordinary range of practical activities that Friends today are involved in as evidence of this faith in action. They were actions, he felt, that were ‘achieved through stillness, through faithful waiting on God’.
Discipline
The discipline of Quakerism, he believed, has become more of a defining factor in the lives of ‘some of us than allegiance to a specifically Christian or other faith’ and, while he described himself as a ‘Christian Quaker’, he emphasised that ‘it was a way’ for him, rather than a notion, and that ‘no two Christians are remotely the same’.
The true ground of love and unity is not that another man walks as you do but, as Isaac Pennington wrote, ‘because I feel the same Spirit and life in him’. This sense of openness and tolerance towards others seemed to underpin the speaker’s own approach and he concluded by acknowledging the kindness he had experienced in the Quaker community.
He said: ‘Plato wrote “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle”. If love is the first motion, kindness is never far behind. And kindness and love are to be found, above all, in listening. Quakers listen. It is part of what it means to be a Quaker today’.
The packed main meeting room then had an opportunity to share their own thoughts. A Friend opened by strongly endorsing the call for Quakers to listen. He said: ‘We need courage to go with our convictions – and the simplicity that can go with this faith – to listen.
Hope
Between the twin poles of smugness and despair, a Friend suggested, there is a counter – hope: ‘One of the reasons that I am a Quaker is that what we are and what we believe and what we do arises out of our experience. We bring our experiences to one another and we test our experience with each other and with many others of different faith traditions. We have the dynamic equilibrium between the individual and the community. We work in a society where we start from the individual and go out and come back to the individual.’
The transforming effect of becoming a Quaker was commented on by several contributors. A Friend, very movingly, expressed her personal experience: ‘Fifteen years ago faith found me. I was not looking for a community but I found one. It transformed my life. It enabled me to go out into the world’.
For some Friends being a Quaker in strongly expressed in the actions they take on this earth. Belief, for others, is crucial. A Friend said: ‘I believe in a great power or Spirit of creative intent in the universe and perhaps beyond. I implore Friends to sustain the joy of the creative spirit among us.’
Concern
A Friend voiced a concern, commenting on the white, middle class, nature of Quakers today, and said: ‘I would love to see more people from all backgrounds come in to our society. I know that we share a belief that there is that of God in everyone – but I do hope we will see a collection of Friends from all walks of life.’
Another Friend, having heard how some Quakers had introduced a series of physical exercises before their worship, urged others ‘to experiment more’.
Being a Friend today, for another contributor, also meant change and experiment: ‘I tend to need to find practices from other faiths as ways to develop my spiritual growth. Is it appropriate to have a compendium of spiritual practices.’
This openness to listen to others also applied within Quakerism. A Friend commented: ‘I was particularly glad that Geoffrey put our extra ‘labels’ where they belong. I have always had difficulty with an external God. But I am very much aware of the enormous range within our Quaker family and at our session on the FWCC conference in Kabarak in Kenya I witnessed Friends with a really deep sense of the healing power of Jesus Christ. I realised that my understanding of being a Quaker is not the same as theirs but that it must include them’.
Being good
A young student quoted Aristotle and, talking of what was important, stressed ‘It is not knowing what is good – but being good’. She felt some people find this very difficult without a ‘check list’ to help them and said that it is more difficult ‘listening to love’. We should consider what it is we must be and what it is we must do.
A Friend agreed: ‘Being without doing is pretty meaningless’. He described Quakers as having a ‘golden nugget’ in their belief that there is something of God in everyone. He urged Quakers, however, to take it further. It should, today, in a world where sustainability is such a burning issue, lead us to reconsider. We should be proclaiming that ‘there is something of God in every living thing’.
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